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Are we pursuing an outdated model of work-life balance that no longer reflects our realities? In my book, Work-Life Tango: Finding Happiness, Harmony and Peak Performance Wherever You Work, I present a contemporary perspective aimed at helping individuals thrive both personally and professionally, without the accompanying guilt often associated with the traditional work-life balance. The conventional 9 to 5 workday has largely become obsolete, thanks to technological advancements that keep us connected at all hours.
This evolution in our work environment necessitates a more deliberate approach to how we manage our time. It is crucial for us to engage in our work and lives with intention. Drawing from insights in my book, here are three strategies to facilitate this purposeful living.
Related: Why Work-Life Balance Is Overrated — and What to Pursue Instead
1. Cultivate Self-Awareness
The opening chapter of Work-Life Tango humorously titled “When You Think You’re Doing the Tango, But You’re Really Doing the Chicken Dance,” emphasizes the importance of understanding your current situation. To achieve meaningful change, you must first conduct a compassionate introspection into your circumstances. Without this awareness, transforming areas that cause frustration and stagnation becomes incredibly challenging.
For instance, I once found myself feeling overwhelmed each morning. Curious about this sensation, I traced it back to my habit of reaching for my phone immediately after waking. The ritual of shutting off my alarm inevitably led to a cascade of distractions—checking messages, emails, news updates, and social media—before I even stepped out of bed. Consequently, I often began my day already feeling irritated or anxious based on what I encountered during that time.
Once I recognized this pattern, I faced a choice: to continue this routine or to establish a new morning approach. I opted for the latter. I began implementing a morning ritual that involved stretching, meditating, and setting intentions for the day ahead. These new practices helped me cultivate feelings of happiness, health, and groundedness. Ultimately, self-awareness empowers you to make more conscious choices.
2. Strengthen Your Relationship with Yourself
Your personal relationship plays a pivotal role in how you navigate various aspects of life. When you foster a positive connection with yourself, you’re better equipped to engage meaningfully with your work and personal endeavors. You will also gain clarity regarding your values and priorities. An essential exercise is to recognize activities that rejuvenate you—those that leave you feeling energized and fulfilled. Are you dedicating time to these pursuits? If not, consider how you can reorganize your priorities to give yourself the attention and care you deserve.
Related: 10 Myths About Work-Life Balance and What to Do Instead
3. Recognize Time Wasters
Identify the distractions that consume your time and offer little benefit in return. Whether it’s your phone, with its persistent notifications and the lure of social media, or the habit of attempting to multitask, leading to feelings of chaos and overwhelm, these elements can drain your focus. Additionally, struggling with personal boundaries often results in the need to agree to commitments when you’d rather decline.
In Work-Life Tango, I assert that establishing boundaries is a vital aspect of self-respect. Although uncomfortable at times, setting boundaries is essential for nurturing a vibrant work-life. By recognizing these disruptive influences, you can actively choose how to respond, effectively reclaiming your autonomy and intentionally directing your life.
Life’s varied phases can sometimes complicate the elusive idea of balance. Therefore, I prefer to refer to work-life balance as work-life harmony. Through self-awareness and purpose, we can uncover inner balance, joy, and meaning—the attributes that many of us truly seek.
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